Unconditional Love

It’s summertime - a perfect time to talk about "Love”!!! Not just any kind of love – Unconditional Love. Most of us have experienced some form of love but not many of us have ever experienced unconditional love.  

Our parents loved us in the best way they could and if we were lucky – that love was unconditional. However, not all parents are capable of giving love unconditionally.  Parenting is challenging – to say the least. Then there is the programming passed down through the generations on how to parent via society and family.  I personally think it takes a really conscious person to develop and follow their own road map to parenting. That is a topic for another time. For now, we are talking about unconditional love.  

What does loving unconditionally mean? In my most humble opinion – it is, loving someone without attachment or the desire to receive anything in return – including returned love. It is giving without any expectations or ROI (return on investment). Unconditional love is limitless, boundless and unchanging.  Most of the time we humans - put conditions on love. We say: "I will love you, if….” Or "I am falling out of love with you because….”

Unconditional love has an element of altruism at it’s’ core. Altruism is a virtue. It is selflessness without the feelings of duty or the need to be loyal.  If we feel it is our duty to give of ourselves – that is a moral obligation and not unconditional.  Being altruistic is sacrificing self with no expectation to be compensated, in any way. This also includes any expectation of becoming enlightened, gaining merit or going to heaven.

I know this is a touchy subject and at the same time, it must be mentioned. There are people who perform deeds with the above intentions in mind. I think it is wonderful to give and help and I also believe we have to be clear about why we are doing something. What is the motivation?  If the intention is to gain in any way – it cannot be considered unconditional.  

So, how do we obtain this seemingly illusive form of love? First of all, I believe we have to give it to ourselves. We must love all the aspects of self, including the aspects we don’t like. I know this sounds hard, and at the same time it is the truth. Our world is a mirror. It mirrors back to us our beliefs and feelings. If we don’t love ourselves, we will just get that mirrored back – sometimes in a very big way. We must dig into our subconscious to ferret out all the ways we sabotage receiving the love we so desperately seek.

Secondly, we must stop looking to other people to give us love of any kind. If we consistently look outside of ourselves for someone else to love us, we will never get it – it’s the mirror again.

Thirdly, we do receive unconditional love. It’s all around us – we just need to see it. It is our view of the world that causes us not to see that we are loved.  We are – each of us – a part of the Great Mother and Father, who loves us unconditionally. It really doesn’t matter what we have or haven’t done – we are still loved. One group of people isn’t loved any more or less than any other group of people.  Think about it, when it rains – doesn’t everyone outside get wet?

I know this is a simple example and maybe I should make it more complex. The point is however, if we look within we will feel the love that we seek.  The Great Mother and Father live within each of us. They are waiting for us to look in the mirror of self. When we do this, their love is reflected back to us. It is boundless, altruistic, unchanging, and unconditional, no strings attached love.  We then will begin to see things as they really are.

Isn’t it time you go within to receive the love you seek?

See you next month!!!